Importance of fetishes
While trying to think of what to post on my website, many ideas pass my mind. One is regarding the reason I actually started with everything I do online: the importance of fetishes. For me, it’s the most normal thing in life. For many it is something to frown upon, and I’ve had my share of struggles in previous relationships. Many like a hint of kink in the bedroom, and I believe Fifty Shades of Grey normalised some of it. But when it comes to being fully latex clad, it’s like pulling the needle over the record.
The more I talked to fetishists, the more I realised how different the origins of our lifestyle are. Hence, I came up with the Fetish 11 Project. For me, it goes back to my early childhood. It’s too long ago to remember how old, or better, how young, I was. But I remember going into the basement of our house. My family were active in sailing and surfing, and there were neoprene surf suits in the basement. Somehow I was drawn toward them, and I used to put them on occasionally. The tightness gave me this weird feeling of happiness. It was way before my teenage years, and I wasn’t aware why it made me feel so good at the time.
During my teenage years I learnt about sexuality and fetishes. This was also the time when I ventured into the fetish world. Back in the day, the internet wasn’t a thing and was still under development. So you would actually have to go to brick-and-mortar shops. Being fairly shy and introverted didn’t make things easy, but I found my ways to enjoy my fetish life.
The one thing I never experienced was sharing it with my partners. In the early days this wasn’t much of an issue, as I simply enjoyed it on my own. But as I grew older and relationships became more serious, it became somewhat of a problem. The more I shared, the less they liked it. So my fetish became something that was shoved to the back of my mind. Something I enjoyed while alone. And I’ve tried to share it with almost all of my previous partners, using different approaches to no avail.
Once I rubbered up spontaneously to surprise a partner back in the early 2000s who told me to get out of it immediately. No success there, and she basically told me she doesn’t like anything tight. So my fetish went to the back of the closet. Weirdly enough, she seemed to enjoy browsing through some fetish magazines, nimby!
My previous partner shared some, which she considered sexy, pics on an IG account. Mostly short dresses and (over-the) knee boots. Looks nice, but something you wear to a party is not what gets me going on that front. Going through the feed, I found an image of Latex Lucy, as we all know her, in head-to-toe latex and a tight-laced corset. Showed it to her, saying, ‘This seems like something for me.’
Her response was clear: that wasn’t going to happen. Saying her figure doesn’t allow for it and the hood was a no-go. Although she confessed to buying a latex dress to surprise me but returned it ‘because it shows everything’. Told her that being naked also shows everything and that latex even hides small ‘imperfections’. Over time I realised how incredibly vanilla she was, and the relationship just didn’t last.
So I’ve struggled sharing my kinks and perversities. A lot. But I never considered ignoring my desires because of the importance of fetishes in my life. My previous relationship partly because she was so incredibly vanilla. It’s like living a life without exploring things to their full potential. The stupid thing is that it took life-changing events to take those decisions. Losing a loved one was the reason to start sharing my images on social media. Losing another was the reason to end my previous relationship. And I don’t regret doing so, it has brought me so much more in life.
I’ve never wondered where my desires come from and have always accepted having certain interests. The why was never a question in my head. The how, on the other hand, was another thing. Personally I think you should try anything you’re interested in, and I’ve always done so. Sadly, many people still frown upon things they don’t (want to) understand. It’s easier to judge. I even see this with my own friends and family, who have no clue what I do privately and about my activity in the fetish world.
My fetishes are part of me and my life and have brought me many great things. Ever since I embraced them fully, my life has only got better, and it helped me find my wife. The one who doesn’t judge me for having kinks but shares them with me instead. I would love to see more acceptance for the things we enjoy. As I think the people who embrace kinks are actually happier and also more genuine in daily life.
Before meeting her, I didn’t believe in spending life together in eternity. I used to say this openly, followed by: ‘If we grow old together, we’ve had an amazing life.’ Now I say she is the last one. The one. Our first date lasted nearly a week, and we took a deep plunge into getting to know each other. We started talking online, and we’ve never stopped. Fetish is what brought us together and keeps us together, and it greatly enriches our lives as we both understand the importance of fetishes.
Fetics
